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  • Writer's pictureSupervision Monitors

Custodial Parents: Look in the mirror

You may not feel you are alienating your child from their other parent but be aware of these signs.

You tell your child they have a choice about spending time with their other parent. Custody orders are very clear when it comes to parenting time and directly, or indirectly, implying your child can control the court order is false. Instead, encourage the visits, don't discourage them. Remember, this is about the lifelong relationship your child will have with their other parent and will influence their ability to have healthy relationships with others throughout their lives.

You talk about the marital relationship, the divorce, financial matters in front of your child. Remember, there is never a good reason to do this. Ever. Children should not be burdened with adult matters. Let your child be a child.

You act hurt, sad, or angry when your child has a good time with their other parent. You may be saying all the 'right things,’ but what is your child seeing? Remember, 93 percent of all communication is nonverbal.

You listen to your child when they are on a phone/video call with the other parent. Remember, you are interfering in the relationship between your child and the other parent and giving your child reason to not trust you.

You make it difficult or refuse to allow your child to spend time with their extended family such as grandparents. Remember, your child needs their family relationships especially during difficult times. Your child is already dealing with severe loss because of the divorce. Don’t make them lose their other extended family too.

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